Oh God! Yes!
Summary: A lone interviewee tells the tale of a swingers club that allegedly operates under the guise of being a North Huntingdon "church." Reporter: Ralph Iannotti, KDKA Channel 2 Airtime: 2 minutes, 43 seconds on Sept. 4 Visuals: * A graphic of the "Holy Bible." * The male interview subject, who stands with both hands covering his private parts as he speaks -- as though he may having something to um, hide ... Highlights: * When anchor Patrice King Brown plugs, "It's called a church, but neighbors say something else is going on behind closed doors. Tonight, a man who used to attend ... is setting the record straight." * When Iannotti huffs, "Officials are taking a long, hard look at a private residence here in Westmoreland County which bills itself as 'a church for adults only.' Critics complain it's a swingers club. And tonight I talked to a man who says he's a former member." He continues, "There's nothing unusual about this two-story building tucked away off Turner Valley Road. A small sign by the building's side door says this is the 'nondenominational church of spiritual humanism. For private members, not open to the public.'" * When the member, who was apparently thumping everything but the Bible, recounts, "When you go upstairs into the rooms, it's like walking into a porno. 'Cause everybody's havin' fun. And that's what it all boiled down to is having fun, and enjoy the partner you're with or whoever." He elaborates, "Sometimes there would be an orgy. And other times it was just a small group. But nuttin's ever got outta hand down there for them in order to call the cops or anything like that." * When Iannotti offers some background info, "The so-called church is run by [a man] who claims he's a reverend and his [wife], who live in Washington County. ... It's been a swingers club here for years, according to [this man] and people who live in this neighborhood. Residents who this week gave local officials a petition all in opposition to the idea of approving an exception to an ordinance which would continue to allow the business to be run out of a private residence. Why does [this man] and other neighbors in the area now want to see the establishment closed?" * When the man admits, "I don't blame 'em for complainin'. Who wants to see condom packets everywhere?" What We Learned: The Lord works in mysterious lays. Unanswered Question: How can one person set the record straight? Particularly since he's alleging this was a group thing? News Value: 1. There is a story here, but this isn't it. Listening to the unnecessarily lengthy -- and yet amazingly banal, considering the subject matter -- interview with this "member," I almost felt like I should be wearing a condom, to protect me from risky reporting.