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Prom

The trials and tribulations of attending the big school dance

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In Disney's fantasy universe, all the kids at Ideal Body Weight High simply can't wait to go to the prom. As a voiceover reminds us, it's the "one night that brings us all together." Having been to high school, I beg to differ, but here we go: Pretty, perky Nova (Aimee Teegarden) and "rebel" Jesse (Thomas McDonell) team up to decorate the cafeteria while the rest of their classmates fret about finding dates. Boy-girl dates, with corsages and slow-dancing performed at arm's length. It's like Prom 1911! Joe Nussbaum's prim-and-proper piece of taffeta-covered tripe should cause elementary girls to swoon; real teens will be howling at lines like Jesse's declaration of coolness to Nova: "Your world may be all disco balls and celestial fountains, but that's not where I live. I'm a bad boy."

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