We all know the Pirates stink. They have stunk up this once proud Baseball city for a decade and a half now ... But amongst the dark clouds there is always a silver lining. So this Giant Idea is free for anyone willing to take it on. It would take someone with vision, guts and a little money to get it started, but this idea is huge. Are you ready? Brace yourself.
Start another Baseball team in Pittsburgh! Go ahead, think about it, let the idea sit with you a minute. Soak in the brilliance. I don't pretend to know anything about leagues, associations, or any of the other organizational details that would need to be worked out. I'm the idea guy ... Here's how you do it:
1) Fireworks. This is Pittsburgh after all, so you'll need fireworks, lots of fireworks. The more the merrier. Set fireworks off at every opportunity, why wait for a home run? Hand out bottle rockets at the gate and let the fans decide. Fun for the whole family.
2) Hire Barry Bonds! Oh yeah, that's a Giant Idea. Imagine the PR, the pathos, the sheer madness that would cause. Heck, you'd sell out every game for a year.
3) Build your park over on the North Shore! Nothing fancy mind you, in fact, the more like a cheap, traditional, little league park you make it the better. All the seats are the cheap seats! Let the fans grill in the outfield, have a water park for the kiddies, hold hot-air balloon rides, have a in-house clown, maybe even a panda on loan from the Chinese! Anything goes ... Go nuts.
4) So what do we call this team? Personally I like The Pittsburgh Rapscallions!! But you can come up with your own name I suppose. Whatever you call 'em, make it clear that these are the Anti-Pirates! They can play against local High School teams so they win almost every game. Heck, fix it so they do. Every game is a winning game!! Whoo-Hooo! Finally, this town has a winner.
... Granted, some of these ideas might not work, but the concept is still valid. Who has the guts to try it? The clerk at the store this morning told me my PowerBall ticket was a winner, so maybe I'll do it.