Give Me Liberty or Give Me Death -- as long as I can find my mittens | Slag Heap

Give Me Liberty or Give Me Death -- as long as I can find my mittens

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Earlier this week, I posted the full text of the Tea Party Movement's Declaration of Independence. And there's no question the Tea Partiers take themselves seriously -- at 1,900 words, the Tea Party Decleration is nearly 50 percent longer than the original signed by our founding fathers

And both documents end the same way -- with a stirring promise to pledge "our Lives our Fortunes, and our sacred Honor" in the cause of liberty.

Well, guess what? It seems that sacred Honor doesn't get the roads salted. 

Yes, it's sad to say, but apparently, a Birthday Party for the Tea Party -- slated to be held in the North Hills tomorrow -- has been called off due to weather. I just got the following message from the Tea Party folks: 

The Anniversary Party of the First Pittsburgh Tea Party and Birthday Party of the Pittsburgh Tea Party Movement has been cancelled due to the snowstorm. The event will be rescheduled at a different venue and details will follow ...

If you have already purchased food for the event, please invite your friends or neighbors over to your house for your own personal tea party.

Hold on a minute. I mean, I know it's slippy out. But you just issued a statement pledging to oppose those who wish "to impose a Socialist agenda on our Republic." According to your Declaration, there is nothing less at stake here than "socialist schemes designed to bankrupt us and put the American people in a position of dependence on the State, as peasants begging for their very sustenance." You have declared a willingness to put your lives on the line in order to keep us free of the yoke of oppression ... 

But you're gonna let a weather forecast turn you aside? 

Hey, Tea Partiers: You think George Washington gave up on Valley Forge because there might be a little snow? The guy crossed the Delaware River on Christmas Eve -- and you can't make it up McKnight Road on a Saturday? If you can't even defy Julie Bologna, how are you going to stand up to the tyrants and oppressors?

And remember: A lot of these winter-weather advisories come from the government, in the form of the National Weather Service. Since when are you gonna let some government bureaucrat tell you where to go? These are the same people who believe in global climate change, for God's sake. 

So get out there and celebrate your commitment to God-given freedom.  And if your Hummer ends up in a ditch, don't worry: The invisible hand of the free-market -- in the form of a towing service -- will be there to pull you out.

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